You're sexy. You're smart. So be part of the real sexual revolution; Join us for candid talk about intimacy, relationships, protection, and more.
Buy a Box, Give a Box

65 million Americans are currently living with an STD.* And Women are twice as likely as men to contract an STD.* Find out how you can make a difference. Join the Cause. Visit

*Source: American Social Health Association

« Sex After Baby: Does it Ever Get Better? | Main | Time to Buy Plan B!!! »



Very interesting points here.'s always nice to hear the male perspective. I think the biggest problem I have with this whole thing is the whopping generalization. I've heard that sex does plummet in long term relationships, but I strongly feel that there are other factors that cause this besides it being 'the woman's fault'. Especially since most women in this day and age will agree to enjoying sex....ALOT more than most males realise.

Teresa Valdez Klein

I couldn't agree with you more, Liz. Correlations and causations are often confused by the general public and the popular press after reading a study. You can only establish causation by manipulating variables in a laboratory experiment. Field research is almost always purely correlational.

I'd say from my own personal experience that becoming comfortable in a relationship can put stress on the sexual part of things. But in a good relationship, communication and support go a long way towards establishing a healthy sex life.

One of the things that I love about my relationship is that my fiancé understands when I'm not interested in sex and has learned not to put pressure on me about it. My level of desire goes through peaks and valleys, and will return at some point.


The problem is, these studies are conducted and so often correlation leads to an assumption about causation. Recently, I've also become concerned with the "why" of studies being conducted, which can often skew results. Finally, I think any time we discuss the "most" of anything we are treading in dangerous waters, as people are truly individuals and I find gender generalizations lazy and offensive, usually to both men and women.

As presented, the study seems to be saying that it is a physical characteristic of women that they become less interested in sex after 4 years and that men remain interested - I just find that a really simplistic conclusion.

And yes, my experience with men - anecdotal though it be - shows that they start slowing down big time with age. Which I found to be a surprising discovery considering the way we talk about men and women's sexuality.


Typical - you object to the study since it is not always true or not true for 100% of the group they talk about.

I don't know how true these results are - but I do know several things to be true in General (most people)
- More men think of something sexual more often eery day
- More men want sex more often than women do
- More men think of having sex with other women than the one they are with whether they do it or not
- More men cheat on the woman they are with
- the reasons men and women get into a relationship is not always the same reasons
- what men think is satisfying in a relationship is different from what women think is satisfying
- Just because some women are the exception does not mean there is no rule about most women (women don't like to admit some things about themselves so they object)

Some men don't want sex as much as some women but the rule still holds
Nymphos are the exception to most women though more women want more sex than men may realize
Wanting sex does not mean you know how to have sex very well
Sex is different from making love -

More often than not, when I say something to a woman or a group of women about some generalization about women, most of them object to it
When I bring some generalization about men to a man or a group of men, most of the time they generally agree.

Go Figure!


Yeah, the problem about these "studies" is they just never look at causation. A man leaving all the work to his wife and then complaining about her sex drive is just one example of why some of these lame statistics exist.

And I love you bringing up viagra. At 35 so many people seem to think I should date men 10 years older than me - DUDE, THEY CAN'T KEEP UP! Seriously, it's been my observation that all things being EQUAL, it's men that slow down first.


My fiancé and I will celebrate our four year anniversary a week from today. We're both 23 and the sex is great. It's true that I don't want to have sex as much as I used to, and I know that's a function of being in a long-term relationship. The serious work of being with someone does kill my sex drive somewhat.

I find that I'm more attracted to him when our apartment is not a mess and the dishes get done. But as a general rule, we don't put too much pressure on one another about sex. It happens when it happens, masturbation is always an option, and we don't read too much into it.

The comments to this entry are closed.

Let us hear from you and remember, inappropriate posts will be removed

Save $2.00
Our Bloggers
Logan Levkoff Logan Levkoff
Sexologist/Relationship Expert/TV Personality/Advice Columnist
Liz Rizzo Liz Rizzo
Vixen Vixen
Bad Girls Rule
Yvonne Fulbright Yvonne Fulbright
Sexologist/Sex Educator
Kellie Murphy Kellie Murphy
Pepper Schwartz Pepper Schwartz
Professor of Sociology, University of Washington

Recent Comments

What a nice blog I liked it very much thanks for your creative work done by you.

...

Posted by: Robin Woods | Nov 18, 2010 4:08:15 AM

Cialis works the same way as Viagra. Both the drugs enhance blood flow to the groin area. The major point of
difference is that Cialis remains effective for a 36-hour time period, compared to... Read More >>

Posted by: generic viagra cialis | Jul 15, 2009 10:17:35 PM

Best Penis Enlargement & Male Enhancement Product
Best penis enlargement product that give fastest results, bigest gains, as well as improved erection hardness, cures premature ejaculatio... Read More >>

Posted by: penis enlargement pills | Jul 1, 2009 6:13:20 AM

Using natural penis enlargement techniques. Try it risk free or you visit

...

Posted by: Penis Enlargement | May 21, 2009 8:00:06 AM

VIAGRA [Sildenafil citrate] is the only approved and effective oral agent for the treatment of erectile dysfunction. Before that a few lines on erectile dysfunction.

...

Posted by: buy generic cialis | May 21, 2009 4:34:22 AM

Avodart acts as a panacea for the enlarged prostate disease. It works by shrinking the quantity of the male hormone, dihydrotestosterone (DHT) that leads to the minimization an enlarged prostate. ... Read More >>

Posted by: プロペシア | May 21, 2009 2:03:44 AM

It's really great to post my comments on such a blog. I would like to appreciate the great work done by the web master and would like to tell everyone that they should post their interesting co... Read More >>

Posted by: Penis enlargement | May 17, 2009 1:05:09 AM

penisenlargement products reviews by consumer best choice to select one of the best penis enlargement system to get longer, larger and harder penis size with powerful erection and long time penis r... Read More >>

Posted by: penisenlargement | May 16, 2009 4:12:35 AM

penisenlargement products reviews by consumer best choice to select one of the best penis enlargement system to get longer, larger and harder penis size with powerful erection and long time penis r... Read More >>

Posted by: penisenlargement | May 14, 2009 7:53:04 PM

penisenlargement products reviews by consumer best choice to select one of the best penis enlargement system to get longer, larger and harder penis size with powerful erection and long time penis r... Read More >>

Posted by: penisenlargement | May 13, 2009 4:22:40 AM

Have a Question? Click here for answers

Buy Discreetly
Click here to buy Elexa™ Vibrating RingBuy Discreetly
Buy Discreetly
Elexa™ Vibrating Ring is not for sale in AL, CO, GA, KS, LA, MS, TX or VA.